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Here ya go
Select McSweeney's Headlines
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I'm a Holiday Gift Guide Writer and I Really Need You Pricks to Start Playing Backgammon
Select Reductress Headlines
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Woman Utterly Blindsided by Dinnertime
Wow! This Woman Took Medical Advice from Twitter and Now She's Dead
How to Act Cool Even Though Last Night You Fell Asleep to "Relaxing Music for Dogs"
Here's a Picture of the Container Store to Help Get You Off
Feminist Hero? This Woman Was Instantly Approved for a Credit Card in the Mail
Woman Spends Entire 1pm Meal Planning 4pm Meal
Bummer! This Hot Guy Believes in God
6 Hairstyles Your Cruel Niece will Mock You For
8 Year Old Snaps Stunning Portrait of Apple Juice On Plane
Wanna Feel Old? ...No? Then Move Along Bitch, This Content's Not for You
How to Whiten Your Teeth While Your Gums Scream and Scream
How to Stop Saying "Does That Make Sense?" During Dirty Talk
I Practice Intuitive Eating, and My Intuition Tells Me I Need 12 Servings of Hawaiian Rolls
This Woman Isn't Financially or Emotionally Ready to Own a Dog, But She's Not Gonna Let That Stop Her
Aww! This Couple Does Everything Together Besides Cum
Woman Lasts an Entire Party Saying Only the Word "Definitely"
Carrie's Vision Board is Just Two Pieces of Bread Stapled to Cardboard
This Female CEO is Still in Charge of Baking Cupcakes When There's an Office Birthday
We Interviewed 13 Queer Women About Their Dating Lives and Lost the Transcript
Pinterest Told Me to Recycle My Best Friend Into a Festive Centerpiece, So I Did
Tall Woman in Car Full of Short Men Forced to Sit in Middle Seat
Select The New Yorker Headlines
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Hurry -- This Mattress Sale Won't Last Forever (Nothing Does)!
Select Points in Case Headlines
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Job Listing for a Company That Does Things Hella Different
I'm a Small Business Owner in a Credit Card Commercial, and My Cross Stitch Company is a Drug Front
I'm a Dog Architect, and Here's Why Your Whole House Should Be Windows
I'm the Brand Voice for a New Start-Up, and I'm Super Horny for My Target Demographic
An Obituary for Your "College Friends" Group Chat
Select Belladonna Headlines
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I'm a Pile of Free Dirt on Craigslist, and I Am Enough
Sorry I'm Running Late, The Cicada in My Bathroom Has Me Trapped in Sort of a "Saw" Situation
I'm Going Through a Hard Time and Can Only Express Myself Through My Work, Naming Paint Colors for Sherwin-Williams
Select Robot Butt Headlines
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7 Must-See Attractions in the Fictional Country in a Spy Movie
Select Humor Darling Headlines
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I'm Your Innocent Dog in a Horror Movie, and I Don't Deserve This
Select LadySpike Headlines
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I Do My Best to Support Small Business By Only Shoplifting Local
Woman Goes Completely Zero-Waste Except for Her Trash Boyfriend
Woman's Left Boob Totally Bringing A-Game Today
5 Spaghetti Squash Recipes Guaranteed to Satisfy No One
Heartbreaking! Woman Accidentally Closes Tabs She's Had Open for 15 Years
This Woman's Intersectional Feminism Somehow Only Includes Hot People?
Woman to Finally Become Happy After Buying One More Soap
Woman Unsure Where Toxic Thoughts End, Toxic Reality Begins
How to Find a Guy Who Communicates as Well as the Bank of America Live Chat
QUIZ: Is He Attractive, or Does He Just Own More Than One Lamp?
This Woman is Smiling Because She Hasn't Checked Her Credit Score in Five Years
I Would Never Call a Woman a Bitch, Unless She Steals My Good Pen
How to Complain About Being the Only Woman in Your Workplace Even Though You're Self-Employed
8 Wedding Destinations That Will Be Underwater by 2040
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